The Night is Young... Forever

hmm... that was a kind of random title, oh well. Anyhow, i'm writing about last night. I was really depressed and lonely last night. I don't really know why, usually on friday nights I'm quite happy to just have a quiet evening home alone-well, with my brother too-but you give him the computer and he is satisfied. I just felt lonely, it was friday night and here I was, all alone, sitting in my room, writing in my journal, not even listening to music because I hate the music they play at clubs on friday nights.

So around midnight I decided I would start reading "Guitar Girl" and maybe it would cheer me up since it looked sappy and pointless. I was right about the sappy, i'm not so sure about pointless though. I really liked it. In fact I loved it. It cheered me up, and yes, I finished it, at 5 in the morning i finished it. I wished I hadn't finished it though. It had a very depressing ending. So if you are thinking of reading "Guitar Girl" and don't want the ending to be ruined then don't read any further.

In the end Molly decided she couldn't stand to be Dean's gf, even thought she loved him, he was hott, cute, sexy, loved her and was funny sometimes. Really it was probably the right choice, but still.... I like romances to have happy endings, but in this one Dean ended up going back to his old gf, nicknamed "Hobiscuit" by Molly and her friends. He didn't love her!!! Argh!!! Their relationship was purely physical!!! He loved Molly!!! She loved him!!!! Although I sometimes wondered if their relationship wasn't purely physical too, since whenever they were doing band stuff they yelled and bitched and said they hated eachother. You really must read the book to understand. HE WAS HOTT!!!!!!! ARGH!!!! okay, i need to relax, hottness isn't everything... but he could be really sweet when he wanted to be.... but you had to wonder if that was just so he could get what he wanted from a girl. *sigh*

I am getting really frustrated with my love life. It just is frustrating. DAMN!!! I don't even know if he's alive!!! Var, that is. I wish he would email me. I wish he would look up my phone number and call me. I wish he would steal his grandpa's car and come to my house in the middle of the night and throw stones at my window until I woke up. And then I would sneak out and we would just go somewhere and be alone. *sigh* I better stop now, i'm probably going to worry you guys with all this talk of going places alone with guys in the middle of the night. I swear though, I won't do anything stupid.

We need to do something together!!! I think that's why I'm so lonely, we do all this blog stuff but we havn't actually seen each other for a long time. We used to have history and art and everything else, but now there's nothing. I MISS YOU GUYS!!!! We should go see a movie or go shopping or something!!!